Today, i found out no one will help on you when you need any helps from anyone even though your beloved or so called friend.
Friend, no one will appreciate your effort, what is the meaning to be nice & kind towards friend. They look for you not because of they treat you as friend but they just want to spend their time instead of bored at home. That's called "friend".
Beloved, haha....ridiculous, when the time he goes after you, haha...for sure he will do whatever you request he / she to do. Even follow you to other states, he / she willing to do that without you pleased them. What to do after few years time? He will ask you to call others to fetch you or when you suggested to take taxi, he will just give you a response becareful if you really wanna take taxi home. That's the big difference between before and after.
I wonder what's the main point to have friend / lover? Have friend , to be utilize by them? Have lover, NO COMMENT!!
PARENT IS ALWAYS THE BEST!!!
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Sigh
Past few days, I was happy and lived peacefully, didn't argue with my bf. Even though yesterday was a scary day. My bf was calling me and told me that he is on his way going back home from Subang, but after 2 hours, I still didn't get his call neither his phone cannot get through. I was damn panic at that time, tried to call his mom and his mom told me he still yet back. Oh My Godness, it really scares me. My mind keep on thinking those negative bad things. Luckily end up he called me and told me his phone ran out of battery, unfortunately of the emergency tyre puncture. What a bad day?! Thanks to god at least he is safe.
Today, I was too free and updated my status in Facebook, who knows someone was commented who is the poor guy. I don't expect my bf to put any comments, but what he put there really make me pissed off. He commented "who". Opps..... is it that poor to be my bf or admit he is my bf.
At last, I've removed it and forever I won't put anything about that. I did that because I wanted to make an announcement to the world about he is my Mr. Right but in fact he seems doesn't want anyone know about it!!
Today, I was too free and updated my status in Facebook, who knows someone was commented who is the poor guy. I don't expect my bf to put any comments, but what he put there really make me pissed off. He commented "who". Opps..... is it that poor to be my bf or admit he is my bf.
At last, I've removed it and forever I won't put anything about that. I did that because I wanted to make an announcement to the world about he is my Mr. Right but in fact he seems doesn't want anyone know about it!!
@@ BIG SIGH @@
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
真爱?
原来当一个人对一段感情觉得累了，就算对着曾经深爱的人，都会冷谈对待。今天我领悟到了！！
轰烈爱情的尽头，是幸福的还是伤感的。如果曾经深爱过，分手后，真的可以一笑而过吗？！
爱情，有甜蜜，有苦涩，有欢笑，有悲伤。如果，两个相爱的人在一起，只能共欢乐甜蜜，不能共悲伤苦涩，那算是真爱吗？！
何处才能寻找真爱呢？真爱的结果又是什么呢？
幸福真的是靠自己争取吗？还是上天已经注定了呢？！
轰烈爱情的尽头，是幸福的还是伤感的。如果曾经深爱过，分手后，真的可以一笑而过吗？！
爱情，有甜蜜，有苦涩，有欢笑，有悲伤。如果，两个相爱的人在一起，只能共欢乐甜蜜，不能共悲伤苦涩，那算是真爱吗？！
何处才能寻找真爱呢？真爱的结果又是什么呢？
幸福真的是靠自己争取吗？还是上天已经注定了呢？！
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
孤独的人
其实我今天真的很不开心。他跟我说想我像以前那样，像个小孩子，让他宠爱。事实上，已经不可能了。尤其是当他很忙或很累的时候，我不可以任性，不可以闹别扭，因为会令他很烦。不要说他，连我自己都觉得自己很烦，很令人讨厌。我讨厌现在的自己，孤独且不受欢迎。
今早起来，心情真的很差，满脑子空空的，甚至可以忘了他答应我会留在我家多过一夜。当他打电话给我时，提醒了我。我很开心，因为他记得，也很担心我们见到面又吵架。我真的很害怕吵架的感觉。工作时，头脑还很不清醒，还在发呆。唯有逼自己忙，不去想太多。一个人吃饭真的很悲哀啊，到现在才发觉到自己真的很没有人缘。知心朋友也没几个。或许我当他人是知己，他人当我是朋友而已。
晚上，约了朋友出去吃晚餐。她很贴心的带了她妈妈褒的汤给我喝。说让我补一补。说我的身体不好要照顾，超感动。他打了通电话给我，说他的侄儿有事情不能到我家了。虽然我没有怪他，因为如果是我的侄儿我也会去，只是我却很失落。有时候，真的觉得，人心跟想法有一定的矛盾。尤其是女人。想得很理智，但心里却又莫名其妙的失落。
跟他聊电话，其实有很多东西想告诉他，可是他应该累坏了，没有机会说！哈，对着空气说吧，笨蛋！
前一晚，我劝朋友说，爱一个人是不应该计较结果，只要两个人享受过程过得开心就已经足够了。爱，不计较付出或输赢。可是，在现在的社会与道德，有多少个人真的不计较呢！？！？
唉！我很讨厌一个人上班的感觉。。。无法用言语可以解释。。。
今早起来，心情真的很差，满脑子空空的，甚至可以忘了他答应我会留在我家多过一夜。当他打电话给我时，提醒了我。我很开心，因为他记得，也很担心我们见到面又吵架。我真的很害怕吵架的感觉。工作时，头脑还很不清醒，还在发呆。唯有逼自己忙，不去想太多。一个人吃饭真的很悲哀啊，到现在才发觉到自己真的很没有人缘。知心朋友也没几个。或许我当他人是知己，他人当我是朋友而已。
晚上，约了朋友出去吃晚餐。她很贴心的带了她妈妈褒的汤给我喝。说让我补一补。说我的身体不好要照顾，超感动。他打了通电话给我，说他的侄儿有事情不能到我家了。虽然我没有怪他，因为如果是我的侄儿我也会去，只是我却很失落。有时候，真的觉得，人心跟想法有一定的矛盾。尤其是女人。想得很理智，但心里却又莫名其妙的失落。
跟他聊电话，其实有很多东西想告诉他，可是他应该累坏了，没有机会说！哈，对着空气说吧，笨蛋！
前一晚，我劝朋友说，爱一个人是不应该计较结果，只要两个人享受过程过得开心就已经足够了。爱，不计较付出或输赢。可是，在现在的社会与道德，有多少个人真的不计较呢！？！？
唉！我很讨厌一个人上班的感觉。。。无法用言语可以解释。。。
Monday, September 8, 2008
最心痛 - 冷漠的拥抱
为了小事我们吵了起来。我试着放下尊严， 为了不想伤害两个人之间的感情，我给了身边的他一个拥抱。维持了数秒钟的拥抱，他第一次没有给我任何的拥抱。只是冷冷的躺在一旁。我的心碎了。。。
Sunday, September 7, 2008
枉然
我学着体谅，学着了解，可是刚刚开始学习，就被泼冷水。我的努力有人看到吗？有人知道吗？没有得到鼓励，可是得到的是越界的对待。
如果说出不快乐的事情，是一种错。那我做错了。我以后都不会在说了。再说也是枉然。
如果说出不快乐的事情，是一种错。那我做错了。我以后都不会在说了。再说也是枉然。
Friday, August 29, 2008
Boring Holiday ~~
Today is Friday and going to have 3 days public holiday. I was thinking how to spend all 3 days. Previously, I will planned for that at least 1 month in advance. Plan where to go, travel to other states and etc. There are some differences compared to 1 month back. I wouldn't plan for it anymore. I choose to wait for him, if he is free and willing to bring me go elsewhere.
This morning he called me up, told me that tonight he is going to have a date with me. Haha... so sweet and feel happy. I was looking forward on that. Luckily I dress nicely and brought along my digital camera, he claimed that I haven't take any photos with him yet after I changed a new hair style. He said I look good in that.
Somehow, after dinner, he told me he still have work to follow up, slightly disappointed but as long as I can be with him, I still feel the happiness.
Scratching my head now......really out of idea on how to spend these 3 days.....isshh.....
Hmm....any idea??? (please provide some for me...)
Most probably will stay at home and watch TV or surf through internet or reading some books...how boring is it? Haha.....
Anyway, happy holiday to people in Malaysia, enjoy and chill it !!! CHEERS
This morning he called me up, told me that tonight he is going to have a date with me. Haha... so sweet and feel happy. I was looking forward on that. Luckily I dress nicely and brought along my digital camera, he claimed that I haven't take any photos with him yet after I changed a new hair style. He said I look good in that.
Somehow, after dinner, he told me he still have work to follow up, slightly disappointed but as long as I can be with him, I still feel the happiness.
Scratching my head now......really out of idea on how to spend these 3 days.....isshh.....
Hmm....any idea??? (please provide some for me...)
Most probably will stay at home and watch TV or surf through internet or reading some books...how boring is it? Haha.....
Anyway, happy holiday to people in Malaysia, enjoy and chill it !!! CHEERS
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Am I still the same as first day you fallen on me?
Early in the morning, the 1st thing came into my mind after I wake up. I miss him so much. I can't stop myself from calling him, desired to hear his voice. I called him finally but he still asleep. I told myself have to be independent and I decided to drive to office (scare of taking putra, damn crowded especially after working hour and some more with the bloody heavy notebook, I almost fainted for the last few times).
I'm not in a very good mood today. I hit few road closure on my way to office, and I can't rush for the early bird parking at Dataran Merdeka. But who knows, when i'm around the turning into Dataran Merdeka, the road CLOSED.... I'm really getting crazy and panic that time, I forced to call him whether any parking for me as I late for work. He didn't know. Gosh, no choice. I have to find it myself. At last I managed to get 1 parking where cost me RM 15 bux. Damn IT. When I reached office, only I realized there's Merdeka rehearsal held at Dataran Merdeka. ouchhh
I'm going off soon, today work quite late until 7.00 something but I didn't get any calls from him. I'm starting sad again. Is he really so cruel to me? Is he really forget about me? Is he really don't wanna care about me anymore? I'm keep on thinking of call him in my mind, but I try my hard to stop myself from doing that. I don't want to disturb him. I read back whatever I wrote and the 6 reminds to remind myself think on the bright side. At last, I failed to do it and I call him, I do not know whether is consider lucky or unlucky, I know his phone was out of battery. So, I just stop calling. Who knows, my boss called me up asked me to look for him, and that time I was crying (** sad **). Aiks.......end up, I called and tell him regarding that then hang off.
During dinner time with one of my friend, he called me finally. I feel happy in fact, and he asked me whether am I miss him today. I wanted to tell him I miss him so so so so so much. Just that trying hard myself to control it. Sigh...
Night before that, I really unsure whether are we reattached back and many queries come out to my mind, but after he told me he miss me so much by calling with my nickname (only for him to call) all doubts GONE.
People, pray for me and trust me, I will do better than ever. hoorayyy !!!
I'm not in a very good mood today. I hit few road closure on my way to office, and I can't rush for the early bird parking at Dataran Merdeka. But who knows, when i'm around the turning into Dataran Merdeka, the road CLOSED.... I'm really getting crazy and panic that time, I forced to call him whether any parking for me as I late for work. He didn't know. Gosh, no choice. I have to find it myself. At last I managed to get 1 parking where cost me RM 15 bux. Damn IT. When I reached office, only I realized there's Merdeka rehearsal held at Dataran Merdeka. ouchhh
I'm going off soon, today work quite late until 7.00 something but I didn't get any calls from him. I'm starting sad again. Is he really so cruel to me? Is he really forget about me? Is he really don't wanna care about me anymore? I'm keep on thinking of call him in my mind, but I try my hard to stop myself from doing that. I don't want to disturb him. I read back whatever I wrote and the 6 reminds to remind myself think on the bright side. At last, I failed to do it and I call him, I do not know whether is consider lucky or unlucky, I know his phone was out of battery. So, I just stop calling. Who knows, my boss called me up asked me to look for him, and that time I was crying (** sad **). Aiks.......end up, I called and tell him regarding that then hang off.
During dinner time with one of my friend, he called me finally. I feel happy in fact, and he asked me whether am I miss him today. I wanted to tell him I miss him so so so so so much. Just that trying hard myself to control it. Sigh...
Night before that, I really unsure whether are we reattached back and many queries come out to my mind, but after he told me he miss me so much by calling with my nickname (only for him to call) all doubts GONE.
People, pray for me and trust me, I will do better than ever. hoorayyy !!!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Hopes
My feeling now really up side down, swinging here and there. After 2 hours long talk with my bf, we re-attached. I'm happy cause I love him very much and scare to lose him. Even though, I know he has his own worries. I was sad after he told me that he felt give up to our relationship after few times unsuccessful break up. He told me we seem no future, instead of wasting time doing something with no future why not just stop it right now.
I'm those type won't think worthy of doing something. I just know I feel happy to do it and I love to do it especially towards my love one.
I will try my best to change all my bad personality and I want him to know that we have future until the end. As what he told me "Our Love Will Be The Long Lasting One" . I trust his words and I want to show it to him that's true. I hope we have a very good future forever ever and I wish to hear from him in the future that he sees our good future.
No one in this world is perfect. Human learn from the experience. I'm learning my lessons as well. No matter how hard the way to walk, how much effort I have to put on, I will try my best to "rescue" my relationship with my beloved. I hope after this incident, there will be no scar nor thorn inside our hearts and work out together to rebuild our relationship.
Things to remind myself : -
I'm those type won't think worthy of doing something. I just know I feel happy to do it and I love to do it especially towards my love one.
I will try my best to change all my bad personality and I want him to know that we have future until the end. As what he told me "Our Love Will Be The Long Lasting One" . I trust his words and I want to show it to him that's true. I hope we have a very good future forever ever and I wish to hear from him in the future that he sees our good future.
No one in this world is perfect. Human learn from the experience. I'm learning my lessons as well. No matter how hard the way to walk, how much effort I have to put on, I will try my best to "rescue" my relationship with my beloved. I hope after this incident, there will be no scar nor thorn inside our hearts and work out together to rebuild our relationship.
Things to remind myself : -
- To be confident on people who loving me
- To be understandable
- To be tolerate
- To be forgiveness
- To be independent
- To be self motivate
~~ IF YOU THINK YOU CAN, YOU CAN ~~
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Break up feelings....
I'm really sad at this moment. My bf broke up with me a few hours ago. He told me that he has to concentrate on his work and do not want to waste my time as he don't know when can him able to give me a marriage.
It might be ridiculous for some people but I trust his words. We've been attached for more than 2 years time. We stayed together all this while and I understood he is really a workaholic. Even though I understand his situation, but I really doubt on whether is it impossible to have a good relationship while success on his own career? I'm really really upset at this moment. Non stop crying but who will know this? No one will know about that including himself.
It is hard to find someone you love and have same interests. He likes to sing and me too. He taught me playing pools, we sing & duet, watch drama together (especially Hong Kong drama series), eat chocolate. Both of us like those. But why, today we break up? sigh....
I can't even get used to it. What I can do is crying and my tears are out of my control. He told me not to be sad as he is not worth for me to cry on. I wish to tell him, he is worth and he is the best person I ever met in my life except my family members. He is always caring of me, taught me a lot of things, we have fun , argue and sad together. Even though is just a 2 years time, but it was really meant to me and is a very unforgettable memories. He is always pampered and give me whatever he can gives to me.
His smell, his actions, spread over my room. I really really miss him but what can I do? I can just let him go and proceed with his own career. Maybe few years later, he will meet someone else he really love deeply and wish to get married, I wish I will be the girl, but it just too far from me and I don't think that it will become true. As what he said, we are not suitable to each other.
It is suffer to have such heart broken feelings, and I'm confused whether should I quit my current job. If I continue working in the current company, I will meet him frequently cause we are working under same company. Sigh. I can't let him go but what about him? He is calm when talking to me over the phone. It seems hopeless for us to get back together.
I have to start over my new life now....3 years back ....I was single, and now, I back to single life. It is really difficult for me to become independent now as I was relied on him all this while. Girls, please be independent when you are attached, you'll be suffering if 1 day you lost your beloved just like what am I.
People out there, please treasure your beloved. I feel regret that I didn't 100% treasure during the happiness time. I hope you won't be the next of mine.
It might be ridiculous for some people but I trust his words. We've been attached for more than 2 years time. We stayed together all this while and I understood he is really a workaholic. Even though I understand his situation, but I really doubt on whether is it impossible to have a good relationship while success on his own career? I'm really really upset at this moment. Non stop crying but who will know this? No one will know about that including himself.
It is hard to find someone you love and have same interests. He likes to sing and me too. He taught me playing pools, we sing & duet, watch drama together (especially Hong Kong drama series), eat chocolate. Both of us like those. But why, today we break up? sigh....
I can't even get used to it. What I can do is crying and my tears are out of my control. He told me not to be sad as he is not worth for me to cry on. I wish to tell him, he is worth and he is the best person I ever met in my life except my family members. He is always caring of me, taught me a lot of things, we have fun , argue and sad together. Even though is just a 2 years time, but it was really meant to me and is a very unforgettable memories. He is always pampered and give me whatever he can gives to me.
His smell, his actions, spread over my room. I really really miss him but what can I do? I can just let him go and proceed with his own career. Maybe few years later, he will meet someone else he really love deeply and wish to get married, I wish I will be the girl, but it just too far from me and I don't think that it will become true. As what he said, we are not suitable to each other.
It is suffer to have such heart broken feelings, and I'm confused whether should I quit my current job. If I continue working in the current company, I will meet him frequently cause we are working under same company. Sigh. I can't let him go but what about him? He is calm when talking to me over the phone. It seems hopeless for us to get back together.
I have to start over my new life now....3 years back ....I was single, and now, I back to single life. It is really difficult for me to become independent now as I was relied on him all this while. Girls, please be independent when you are attached, you'll be suffering if 1 day you lost your beloved just like what am I.
People out there, please treasure your beloved. I feel regret that I didn't 100% treasure during the happiness time. I hope you won't be the next of mine.
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